The Battle Against Stuff
I’m sure I’m not the only one to deal with this. I’m tired of the stuff. We have closets and rooms and a garage and a storage room full of stuff. Stuff that I get to organize, put away, clean, fix, take care of. So often I feel that our stuff is controlling us and our lives. It may bring fleeting moments of pleasure and joy, but then it brings hours and days and weeks of drudgery.
The girls get swag, plastic goodies, junk everywhere. The free box at homeschool, friends, Target, prizes for paying attention in class, birthday parties. They bring it home and then won’t get rid of it. Some people think that giving out “art supplies” as swag is “a good thing”. It isn’t. We are overflowing with art supplies. We do not ever need to bring another crayon into this house. We have too many pencils, marker and crayons. Stickers, foamies, coloring books. No more, I’m going to drown.
I feel bad for the people that make these junkies. And think of all the energy and money used to create this stuff that I then have to deal with and get rid of.
Thursday when we couldn’t find a number of things, I cracked once again. We spent the afternoon going through closets, bookshelves, dressers and got rid of stuff. Shirts that fit, but will not get worn. Books that are still good, but that will not get read. We had so much that the girls couldn’t find books to read and clothes to wear. Really.
And if you ask people who have been to our house and know me, they will tell you that our house is generally clutter free and on the Type-A side of being organized. Clutter free isn’t enough, we also need shelves and drawers that have room to breathe.
The garage is now full of things that can go to clutter other people’s houses.
The question that remains is “How do we maintain this?” I can’t tell the kids they can’t have anything new ever and that they must refuse goodie bags. Or that they can’t use the shiny new pen in the goodie bag. But I also can’t throw away an old working pen just because we have a new one.
HELP!!!
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GBK Gwyneth
Let me know when you have the answer to this. I am in a constant state of rampage against the stuff. We consign it. Give it to goodwill. Throw it away. But we still have more.
And I despise goody bags. That junk just ends up staying on the floor of my car. I wish that people wouldn’t do it. I don’t understand the need for it.
Donate the goodies & extra art supplies to the Boys & Girls Club, local library or a daycare/head start program. Have the girls help sort through stuff as they get it & put it directly into a donation box. The junk stuff I toss as soon as they put it down. Good luck! I've recently stepped on this path too and have so much more to do. Ugh.
Kat – yup. I don’t understand the goodie bags and swag either. It is JUNK that uses up precious resources and fills the landfills! What a WASTE!
Kelly – Oh, I know how to get rid of the stuff. I’ve been doing that for years. I don’t do clutter. I constantly weed out stuff.
The point is that I don’t want the stuff to come in the house anymore. I don’t want to toss junk stuff. I don’t want it in the first place.
I’ve been trying to figure out the answer to that question forever.
It’s not the usual to say no to free stuff, and I’m guessing that would cause offense to some people if you just said, “No, thanks, we’ve got plenty of art supplies.” We’re a stuff-driven society. People like to show their appreciation and love with stuff. Bucking that could hurt feelings, but maybe you’d start a trend. Maybe say no whenever you feel it won’t cause a problem and make it known to friends and family that you’re on a stuff diet?
Oh Allison — So right. I’ve been trying to reduce the “gift” ever since Camille was a baby. I devoured the “Unplug the Christmas Machine” but nobody will listen to the request for no gifts.
I do have to say, for the birthday parties we have had, requesting “no gifts” people generally honored it and understood. However, I was criticized for not handing out goodie bags. Sigh.
I really hate those plastic junkies. Imagine the improvement if they were never manufactured in the first place. I’d rather have a few quality things than lots of low quality things. I can’t say that I don’t buy things. I bought a beautiful basket/bag today made in Ghana. But it is of a good quality and somehow more meaningful.
When we went to Chichen Itza, the tour guide asked us to not buy the “Made in China” souvenirs sold inside the grounds. I mean really, why should we be in Mexico and buy Chinese souvenirs?
Now I’ve rambled. But it something I have thought and thought about and have so many mixed feelings about.
I hear you! Have you seen that short video (I’m sure it’s on Youtube) called “The Story of Stuff”? It helped me to explain why I was over all the stuff, to my kids. At our last birthday party, I gave each family one book that I knew all of the kids in that family would enjoy. No goodie bags. It was liberating! We only had four families with lots of kids in each family so it made sense in that instance.
I’m trying to imagine someone with the audacity to criticize a choice not to hand out plastic junk at a party. Isn’t the point to celebrate with the person, not to get more junk? Geez. What about a hand-drawn “thank you for celebrating with me” card instead of a goodie bag? That seems so much more meaningful.
It’s tough…if the stuff comes in, you don’t want to waste it and throw it in the landfill. I have no idea how to go about preventing it entering the house at all….
Madeline – That’s cool! What a nice parting gift for your friends!
Allison – Soon I will have to deal with it. I’m sure that at the Halloween Party at the Beach House, junkies will be handed out as prizes and in goodie bags. My kids will be unhappy if they can’t take the handout, so I won’t put my foot down.
I wish I could be strong enough and ask next year that there be no goodies at the Halloween, Easter, etc parties, but I don’t think I can. Sigh.