unsupported.

As I finished up my work morning and headed to volunteer at the Red Cross, I was feeling low. Very low. Thinking about it, I realized that the root of my lowness — feeling unsupported.

I pride myself in my self-motivation and independence. I work well on my own and solve my own problems as much as I can. I fret about asking for help. But once I’ve exhausted all resources available for me to figure things out, I ask for help. It makes no sense to avoid it when there’s nothing more I can do. When these requests for help are not honored, I feel unsupported.

Today I was under a cloud of unsupprted-ness at both work and at my volunteer position. I have worked in support. I know how easy it is to give a quick answer in order to close a request as quickly as possible. But when that results in time lost for the requestor and more requests, surely it is time to reconsider the metric of “time to close”.

As always, I’ll work through the issues. And I’ll ask for help as I need it. But I wish it felt more like being supported than like disturbing others or pulling teeth. And I’ll try to keep this in mind when others ask me for help too; I know I’m not always the most helpful when people ask me for help, especially when I’m feeling overwhelmed.

tower – 5 may 2015